The Florida Life

The Reason for the Season

2011-12-13T09:51:00.003-05:00

Like Mama quilters everywhere, I'm basting underneath the Christmas tree late at night. And quilting while Sprite busily tangles spools of thread or during her blessed but all too short nap time. But stitch by stitch fabric becomes a quilt to cover my Grandma with love and maybe, just maybe, make her hated wheelchair a happier place.

Knitting in the Sun

2011-12-01T19:49:00.001-05:00

Today was the sort of magical cool-but-sunny first of December day that makes Florida an incredible place to live. So, I sat in the sun and watched Sprite play while I knit. This linen scarf in my favorite feathers and fans pattern was originally intended as a Christmas gift. It doesn't look like it's going to make it, but it's several repeats longer tonight anyway. And my spirit is lighter.

Tag, You're It

2011-11-30T21:43:00.001-05:00

A partially hand made Christmas is feeling more realistic this year, and so I've been working on a few small things.

First up is this little Taggie Blankie for a sweet baby boy. I used two pieces of gorgeous fabric I've been hoarding since a quilty friend sent them to me. Fishing is the big theme in his life, and I think the turtles will add a bit of variety without straying too far. And I think this cuddly blankie was just the right project for those special fabrics.

I had planned to quilt it, but half way through the top stitching I realized that was the wrong plan. It wanted to be soft and drapey. With flannel giving it a soft weight, that was what I had, and extra stitching was just taking away from it. So, I ripped out the top stitching and used an invisible ladder stitch to close it up.

Now, I just need to wrap it up!

All Treat

2011-11-23T09:00:00.001-05:00

But, before the wedding, there was Halloween. Sprite made an incredibly cute Lady Bug. Here she is just before heading out to Trick or Treat with the neighbor girl.She was really confused at first, but caught on quickly. She wasn't all that in to taking the candy at first, but she loved being able to run up to each door and knock on it. As long as the neighbor was there with her, at least. Safety in numbers you know. And she caught on to the candy by the end of the night; Grandma taught her about peanut butter cups. The Halloween candy is now safely out of sight. Frankly, I need to find a moment to get it out of my house, so that I stop eating it, too.

For anyone who is curious, the costume was fairly easy to make. For the dress, I just added a skirt to a black onesie, by gathering the fabric and then sewing it on.

The wings were made by drawing out my own pattern on to four pieces of interfacing, ironing the interfacing on to the fabric, and then cutting all four out. I then cut two batting pieces of the same shape and size by just laying those pieces on top of the batting. Next I layered two pieces, right sides together, and then a piece of batting on top. I sewed around, leaving space to turn at approximately where I expected to sew it on to the onesie dress. After I turned it, I needed to gently press, and then I sewed the opening shut. (I didn't bother with top stitching.)

The wings were then loosely sewn on to the dress with a running stitch. I kept my stitches mostly in the seam line and they were nearly invisible. You have to keep it loose, though, or the stitches will pop when you put the dress on her.

Completing the ensemble - a little red tutu to fluff the skirt out, black stockings and sparkly shoes. That was all she wore to the Halloween party, but on Halloween itself the weather was crisp so I put a long-sleeved onesie underneath it. I couldn't find black at the time, but white really worked just fine. Oh, and I gave her a little purse to use as her candy bag. I had a black headband for her, but she wasn't interested in wearing it.

It really only took a few hours to make, even learning how to deal with the slippery fabric, and she looked a treat.

Sorry, couldn't resist.

Done and Done

2011-11-22T15:14:00.004-05:00

For the first time in over a month, I am home and not packing for the next trip. It's been a grand fall, but I am awfully glad to be home for awhile.
But, in the midst of all that, the wedding quilt did get done. And on time, too. The machine quilting was just about as much of a disaster as I expected it to be. I had serious tension problems, even after testing it on a sample sandwich and reading all the tips I could find, and rip out lots and lots of rows of quilting. It got alot better as I went along, though. I think the problem was my choice to pin baste, even though I saw that as the recommended method on several sites. I like pin basting when I'm hand quilting, but I think it caused too much drag when machine quilting. There was definite distortion in the quilt, even after I ripped out the worst of the too tight quilting.
But, the bride (a quilter) and her Mama (also a quilter) loved it, distortions and all. No one is more generous about a quilt, particularly one where you're trying a new skill, than another quilter. And since I picked a pattern I knew she loved and fabrics that I knew she would love, what was a little distortion in the scheme of things.

It was a funny moment, when she picked up the present, too. She peeked in the gift bag - the best I could do travelling cross-country the day before - and immediately said "this one's from Cara." I guess none of her local friends are quilters! That's just as well, because the card was back in Florida.

So, that's one project done - and the bride and groom were happily married off a week later in a beautiful celebration, so that's done, too. Now, on to Christmas!

Sneak Preview

2011-10-26T18:43:00.001-05:00

When my model is feeling more cooperative, there will be an actual post written from somewhere other than my phone, with photos not taken on my phone.

But for now, let me just say - So Cute!

Back To Our Regularly Scheduled Programming

2011-10-25T10:57:00.001-05:00

Nap time in the car - I was prepared for that.

Intermission

2011-10-24T21:43:00.001-05:00

We interrupt our regularly scheduled slog of hand sewing binding to bring you this Halloween Costume Construction.

I bet you can guess what Sprite will be this year.

On My Way

2011-10-08T18:36:00.001-05:00

And so it begins... Deep breath.

Tie Dye Extravaganza

2011-10-05T07:42:00.002-05:00

I tried my hand at another kind of craftiness last weekend, hosting a tie dye party for 20 of our friends and family.
We ended the day with lots and lot of amazing art work. T-shirts, pillow cases - and my Mom even brought fabric to dye and use later in a quilt. (Smart!)
There was even a "will it be a girl?" onesie.
And, Sprite is now ready for Halloween season with this quirky little Jack O Lantern. I was disappointed when my tie dye was off center, but it turned out to be a happy mistake.
We even had tie dye cupcakes, which I made using the simple rainbow cupcake found everywhere on the internet. (I originally saw it here.)

It was quite simply the best party we've thrown. Because it was a potluck and I had the set up ready ahead of time, I was able to really enjoy my friends and have my turn at the tie dye. Everyone had a great time, and there was very little I needed to do to keep things moving after I gave the original tie dye instructions. My Mom called it a festival, and she wasn't far off. A huge spread of amazing food, lots of good music thanks to Pandora, quilts on the grass and children running wild - and everyone went home with at least one cool piece of tie dye art. We will definitely be doing this again.

Quite well, thank you.

2011-09-22T07:57:00.002-05:00

Mary, Mary quite contrary how does your garden grow?
Blossoms on two of the tomato plants and the jalapeno, lots of growth on the green beans and even a new navy bean plant that sprouted from a bean taken from our pantry... the littlest gardener has high hopes for this fall's garden.

Half Way There

2011-09-21T09:19:00.001-05:00

The top is done, borders and all. I found a pretty blue for the backing, which I still need to piece. And then, its time for a deep breath, lots of basting and some machine quilting. I'm hoping I can be ready for that on Saturday, when the OMQG has its monthly Sew Day. I could use the moral support - and the advice.

Tweet Painting

2011-09-08T15:16:00.004-05:00

Inspired by something I saw on pinterest (dangerous place that), I made this little piece of art this afternoon. It was just a practice piece that didn't have a home when I painted it. But, when I brought it in I realised it works perfectly on the bare nail in my sewing room. Serendipity.

Obviously, I didn't use vinyl letters like the original creator. I cut out my image and glued it down with tacky glue. This technique may take some perfecting. I definitely had bleeding in a few places. I also had trouble getting the paper off after painting, and in some spots the canvas primer came off. Because I'd used an image that doesn't require precise edges, it was easy enough to do a careful touch up with white paint. If I ever do one with words, I will definitely use the vinyl letters.

Also, I love the idea of doing this with your kids. 14 months? Not so much. She was much more interested in banging on the canvas with her toy than painting anything. We'll do some together when she's a little older.

New Adventures

2011-09-07T18:36:00.004-05:00

The quilt is chugging along, 5 out of 7 rows together now. I know I hate putting the rows together, so as I get each row finished I'm attaching them. Almost ready for the borders.

But, in the meantime, I've finally got a garden box. I did quite a bit of research and got some expert advice, but in the end we kept it really simple. Hopefully, not too simple.
With my father-in-law's help, I built a simple 4'x8'x12" frame (no bottom) and filled it with five layers of cardboard. I've been saving boxes for awhile for this! My garage looks much cleaner now that I've finally used them.

The toddler made sure we included lots of love in the garden.
We then collected rich compost from the county dump. You need a shovel, a truck and a strong back, but this is incredible stuff.
And we filled it to the brim with nothing but rich, earthy compost. Yum.
And then, with Sprite's help, I planted three types of tomatoes, petite peppers, jalapeno peppers and bush beans. Yeah! I'm going to try starting my garden from seed later, but since I was cutting it close for a fall garden I went with transplants for now.

Decisions I might come to regret include not sinking posts for the box and not using a weed mat. I deferred to my father-in-law on the posts, and I do have reason to believe he knows what he's doing. I'm just hoping we don't get a hurricane that proves him wrong. And, I decided not to bother with a weed mat having read the layers of cardboard were sufficient. The cardboard will decompose, though, and while the grass should be long gone I'm not clear on what happens with the nematodes. If they find their way in to my garden, I may find myself digging it out to put a weed mat down.

But, for now, Sprite and I have an exciting new garden.

On The Needles

2011-08-28T20:14:00.004-05:00

There's also a sweater for Sprite underway. She picked the yarn out herself, pulling it off the yarn store shelf and refusing to exchange it for any other. That was a surprise; she usually wants them all. Perhaps she's part cat, because she finds yarn very enticing. And, of course, with one good tug she can (and has) undone hours of work. But, the sweater is coming together anyway, and with the bulky yarn I actually make a lot of progress despite my limited knitting time.

I'm not in love with the sweater, though. I think, despite the fact that I'm drawn to it in the skeins, variegated yarn is a mistake when I'm making a sweater. Perhaps the busy color scheme distracts from the pattern of the sweater itself? I'm not sure, but I am noticing that I only like muted variegated yarns when I'm working on something larger than, say a sock.

But, my girl still plays with the yarn every chance she gets, and I suspect she is going to love the sweater. So, I'll finish it and then try the pattern again in something a bit quieter.

Moving Again

2011-08-27T20:48:00.003-05:00

Between a few difficult weeks with Sprite (though, we did get 9 new teeth out of it) and the fact that taking blocks apart and re-working them isn't nearly as much fun as making them in the first place, work on the wedding quilt slowed down to a snail's pace. But, a month later all the blocks are finished, I've settled on a layout and I've even started sewing rows.

I'm much happier with the new blue. Everything flows nicely now, and the quilt was just what I envisioned. It was worth the extra work to do it right. And now the pace has picked back up as I get to watch the quilt come together.

Its sure to stall in a bit here, though. I *think* I've decided to machine quilt it on my sewing machine. I really should be able to on this new machine, and its only a lap size quilt. But, its really intimidating all the same.

Lots of Steps Forward, A Few Steps Back

2011-07-25T21:02:00.003-05:00

The wedding quilt has been making itself. Ten minutes while Sprite re-organizes my fabric, fifteen during her nap, twenty while she plays with Daddy... suddenly I have most of the blocks done in a week. Maybe its that awesome new sewing machine.

Unfortunately, the blocks were flying from my awesome machine so fast that I was near the end before I laid them out to take a look. The photo here is just a random layout, with minimal fussing, of the blocks I'd finished. I'm almost in love with it. But, the distance between almost and just right is pretty big. Everything is perfect except one fabric choice. The light blue that seemed to go so well when I stacked the fat quarters up doesn't work at all in the actual quilt. It reads as a white, and its actually alot more jarring in real life than in this photo. Aargh.

I've toyed with lots of ideas to fix it. I could embroider on those blocks - their names, their wedding date, hearts. Or maybe the right color quilting thread would make it work... But, in the end, I think I have to re-do those squares. Its too big a risk to take, finishing it and hoping the quilting will take care of it. And while I may do some embroidery on it, I really don't want to do that much. This is a wedding quilt, meant to celebrate the love of a very special friend. One that has made a quilt for all the other girls in our group as we married and for our kids as they've come along. Now its her turn, and this one has to be just right.

So, I'll be hitting the fabric stores and then spending some quality time with my seam ripper. Its a good thing I'm making such great progress. November is still a ways away, right? (Nobody remind me I still have to quilt this thing, please. I'm hanging on to the idea that I'm ahead of schedule.)

Back In The Saddle

2011-07-17T20:04:00.003-05:00

It's been six months since I've done any substantial sewing. But recently, Sprite turned one, sporting a GrandmaMade dress and an attitude.

Huzzah!

And with her new independence (and my new role of stay at home mom), has come just a bit more freedom for Mama. She's content to let me do my own thing for chunks of time, as long as I'm willing to pause and make the appropriate animal sounds when she brings me her toy.

So this week, we picked out some pretty fabric and I made her a summer dress.

This is the same Reversible Sundress I made last summer, and so I already had the pattern prepared. With that head start, the dress took me less than three hours to make, even with the need to stop for play breaks and to admire her fabric choices. (She entertained herself in large part by pulling fabrics off the shelf and spreading them about. Occasionally, she'd find a favorite and bring it to me to admire. Or perhaps she was requesting the next dress?) It was simple and quick, a great chance to get to know my new sewing machine - the one I received for Christmas and hadn't even threaded yet. But, oh it felt good to sew something.

And Sprite is such an appreciative recipient. When I held it up to her to check the size, she hugged it to herself and then grinned down at it before grinning up at me. She happily wore it all day Friday, protesting when her grandmother took it off her before dinner. And as pretty as she clearly felt in it, I got that special glow from seeing my kid wear something I've made her. Something I not only actually managed to sew, but that I think she looks cute as a button in.

Emboldened by the success, I bought fabrics for a new quilt the very next day. Its intended for a November wedding, so lets hope I find the time to work on it. Saturday was the OMQG Sew Day, and I slipped away for a few hours and did the cutting. Tonight I set the machine up with a neutral thread and set out my first strips for piecing. Here's hoping tomorrow brings a few sewn seams!

Christmas, done right

2010-12-27T20:47:00.003-05:00

This Christmas was perfectly balanced. We did everything that was important to me, but I resisted the urge to overschedule or overdo.

We visited the tree farm, and put up about half of our decorations. Enough that it felt like Christmas, but not so much I was overwhelmed. And I chose the ones that either wouldn't break or wouldn't break my heart, so that I didn't have to worry about quick little hands as we walked by.

We went to the mall once (and only once) to check out the decorations and find her Christmas outfits. (While there, we made the second out of three visits with Santa. We definitely covered that tradition this year.)

I made the munchkin's stocking, but left the embellishments for another year. I did line it with super soft corduroy from my local quilt shot. Even though she isn't nearly old enough to grasp the importance, she enjoyed pulling things out of it. It was also her only gift from us. We filled it with spoons, rice cereal, a teething toy and a new Dr. Seuss onesie. She cut her first tooth the week before and has been dying to eat solid food. So, the cereal was the best gift we could give her. At five months, she was not surprisingly more interested in eating the paper than in any of the gifts.

It was also the only handmade item given this year. Gifts were lovingly selected and carefully wrapped, but they came from a store. This wasn't the year for handmade for me, and the season was so much more fun because I recognized that. The same goes for baking. I wanted Christmas cookies, but I was fine with getting the dough from the grocery store and just decorating them.

But, we set aside a day for a special trip with Grandma and Aunt Megan. That was important enough for the extra effort.

By the evening of the 23rd, there was nothing left to do but watch The Grinch and drink hot chocolate. By the afternoon of the 25th, we were curled up together reading books. And every hour in between was spent enjoying my girl and her first Christmas.

I'm sure I'll miss it some years, but I sure hope we have many more Christmases with just this lovely mix of important traditions and quiet pleasure. I really feel like we got it right this year.

A Real Christmas

2010-12-19T17:31:00.005-05:00

We woke up Saturday to a gray, cold rain. I declared it the perfect weather for my plans to immerse myself in all things Christmas and sat down to make a list. A few more gifts to pick up, 15 mini cakes to bake for office presents, a trip to the Quilt Shop and a stocking to make for my baby girl...a list worthy of the week before Christmas.

Then my little one woke up from her morning nap in a decidedly restless mood. Normally a munchkin that delights in the very existence of her world, nothing was right yesterday. She didn't seem to need anything in particular, except her parents.

And so, I gave in to it. The day would be about playing with her. We did run a few of those errands, when being out with other people made her happy, but the rest of the shopping list was put aside to wait a few more days. Cakes were baked after she went to bed, and while they aren't the prettiest baked good I've ever gifted I'm confident they'll be appreciated anyway.

I thought today might be the day I got back to that list, but when we got home from church it was clear that today wasn't that day either. Instead, I turned my phone off, set the list aside and decided to just be here. We spent several hours in the rocking chair, took a long nap together, and spent over two hours playing with blocks. Perhaps I'll get a start on her stocking after she goes to bed tonight. Or perhaps I won't. Either way, this has been the perfect week before Christmas. Focused on family and time together, enjoying the rhythm of life instead of fighting it.

The gifts will get wrapped, or they'll be given with just as much love in brown paper bags. And if the stocking doesn't get made, she can borrow mine. But, we will be with family. We will celebrate the birth of a man who asked not for gifts or baked goods, but for kindness to one another. And we will have enjoyed ourselves on the way to the celebration.

At Five Months

2010-12-15T21:43:00.002-05:00

Oh my, kid, you continue to be such a joy. Every month a bit more fun than the last. I may be late writing this letter, but its only because I can't even begin to capture the magic of you these days.

You still laugh and play with wild abandon. And you are learning more and more sounds with which to express that joy. Gs and Ls, lots of ahs. Sometimes you'll throw a B or D in there. You watch how we form words so closely, and we can see you oh so quietly practicing new sounds.

Perhaps most effectively, and certainly most thrilling to me, you now use Mama (or just as often Mamamamam) to call for me or express excitement at seeing me. Boy does it work. You were fussing yourself to sleep one night when you plaintively cried out Mama from your bed. Your Daddy looked and me and said "you're sunk now." And he was right; I couldn't resist and picked you up for a cuddle. His turn is coming, though. You're right on the verge of saying Da-de. You were practicing last night, watching how Daddy was saying it and trying to imitate him. You got tired, though, and turned to look at me and said Mama instead. We had to laugh at the way you reverted to the one you have down, clearly done trying to learn something new. But today you tried out Da-de again while we were playing, and it was clear as day. I couldn't get you to repeat it, but you will. And you will hold your Daddy in the palm of that chubby little hand.

You're sitting up on your own for long periods of time now. So well that the pediatrician checked your birthdate in disbelief when he saw you doing it. You're also trying to get in to a sitting position on your own, and you almost can if you're reclining. We continue to be amazed by your strength. And your cleverness. If you're in your swing and want to get up, you have started holding on to the sides and using your hands to pull yourself up.

While your preference is still to be constantly interacting with you, with new skills comes a greater independence. You're more willing to sit or lay and play with your toys alone for a few minutes. And you'll happily play in your jumperoo (where you jump, jump, jump) as long as I stay within sight. The kitchen also fascinates you now, and I can do a little bit of cooking as long as I bring your Bumbo chair in so that you can watch. You're also putting yourself to sleep more often now, though that generally requires a bit of fussing (and sometimes alot of crying). You take a pacifier from Daddy and I now, too, so that helps. Oh, and your Daddy is very grateful you've agreed to accept a bottle from him now. Thanks for that.

You had a big month, which was capped off by Thanksgiving with the entire family. Baba and Diado came up for a visit, and we all went to DeLand for a big family meal. You met the rest of your cousins there, and took a long nap on the floor with Julie. We were all particularly charmed by the image of you guys sharing a quilt on the floor, and I love that you will have a cousin so close to your age. It will be so much fun watching you grow.

It is so much fun watching you grow.

Look, I made something!

2010-11-20T09:45:00.004-05:00

The Orlando Modern Quilt Guild's monthly sew day is today. My life doesn't exactly lend itself to a sew day right now, and I'm okay with that. But, I did want to participate in the Holiday Craft Project, where guild members are making items for long-term residents of a nursing home, those without regular visitors and who may end up without Christmas gifts.

So, yesterday I dusted off the sewing space. It turns out it takes one nap time and a few hours after the munchkin is in bed to make four pillowcases. The nice flannel should make for a little bit of soft luxury, or at least that's my hope.

My rotary cutting skills are apparently a bit rusty, but overall it felt great to sew. And a quick, but meaningful project was just what the doctor ordered.

Now to make sure I deliver it to the coordinator in time...

A Moment

2010-11-11T07:35:00.004-05:00

I lie in the morning shadows, wishing I could hold this moment forever. The weight of your head on my shoulder, the warmth of your body tucked against mine. You look up at me so seriously, and then a small, sweet smile crosses your face as you raise an uncoordinated hand to pat my face. You are exploring my features, learning my face in a new way. Grabbing at my nose. My breath catches at the magic of it, and I wish I were a writer, an artist. Someone who knew how to capture this moment.

At Four Months

2010-11-09T20:32:00.006-05:00

Oh my lovely baby girl, you are so much fun. I suspect I'll be saying this alot, but I love this stage. Four months - love it. Your sense of humor is so clear now, and you crack yourself up. Everything is a game to you. Making faces with me, trying out your voice with screeches and squeals (and oh my are you vocal these days), grabbing for a toy or the dog (who does not think this game is as much fun - life delights you. You aren't particularly coordinated yet, but you grab life (and the dog) with gusto.

You are so vibrant that strangers are drawn to you like a moth to light. And you revel in it, laughing and giggling, flirting with coy looks as you bury your face in my chest. Unless, of course, your Dad or I actually let that stranger, or, you know, grandparent, hold you. You're a bit early on that one, my love. Your poor Grandma, in particular, has been labeled as the person who comes and makes your Mom leave. All she has to do is walk in to the room and your face crumples. We're making sure to spend more time with all of us together, because she sure loves you alot. You are starting to let her hold you more again, and its a relief to me I'll admit.

That's your MO, though. You are precocious, early to figure things out, but then you take your time once you have. This month you practiced and practiced rolling over from your back to your tummy. For days I watched you on the verge of getting the hang of it, and you'd practice for long stretches of time. Then you got it, suddenly making rolling over look easy and reacting to my celebration with a look that clearly said "what, that? no biggie." And once you master the skill, you no longer feel the need to do it very often. You'll go days now without rolling over (or trying to roll over). But then, when you decide you'd like to roll over, you do so as easily as if you're rolling hundreds of times a day. Do you practice when I'm not looking?

You could be, actually. I went back to work this month. Its only part time, about 20 hours a week away from you. You've adjusted well - developing a routine with your nanny that is completely different from the one you have with me. She's still the only one that you'll really take a bottle for. (Your Dad would really appreciate your adding him to that exclusive list, by the way.) The two of you take long walks and watch the big kids play on the playground at least once a day, and I often come home to find the two of you playing on the floor. Though, just as often, I come home to find you dozing in her arms sucking a pacifier. That's another item you will take only from her, preferring to suck on your own thumb or our fingers when you are with your Dad or me.

What am I forgetting? I know there is so much. You have had a developmental explosion this month. I let go of you one afternoon and you sat up by yourself for a good 30 seconds, a feat you haven't repeated again. We established our first holiday tradition this month, with a Mama-made Halloween costume and a little trick or treating (of sorts). And... life it goes so fast, but it is so great.

The Three Bears Romp

2010-11-04T18:09:00.003-05:00

On Halloween, the three bears locked up the porridge and made the rounds. It was so much fun to have our own little Baby Bear to share Halloween with, and she was fascinated by all the strange decorations and kids running around in costume. She's always interested in the bigger kids these day, and the addition of bright and playful costumes really put it over the top for her.

For me, the joy was establishing the tradition of a Mama-made costume, and that it was more about fun than fancy. I started with Simplicity pattern 5720 and tweaked things a bit to create a bear. (Her father doesn't think I quite accomplished that. He describes her costume as 'some sort of cute little animal' and spent the night saying we were 'apparently' the three bears or that we were 'supposed to be' the three bears.) Her costume was finished off by furry boots and a Halloween bib. Mama and Papa Bear were made by basting a belly patch to a brown shirt and improvising ears sewn to headbands.

So, the first of the holiday traditions has been established. Onward in to the holiday season!

The Countdown

2010-10-19T13:55:00.003-05:00

I return to work Monday. Monday. It no longer requires a qualifier. I don't have to say Monday the 25th, a week from Monday, or even next Monday. Its just Monday.

My leave has been extraordinarily generous, and I'm sort of surprised to find myself here. The time has been slipping away from me.

I have four months.

... the end of October.

.... on the 25th.

... a week from Monday.

And now, its just "Monday."

So, I'm having the second, third and fourth thoughts that most (every?) mother has in the last days of a dwindling maternity leave. And this despite the fact that I am so blessed. I have options and choices so many mothers don't have. (I know; I really do.) My employer has agreed to let me return half time. I can afford to be choosy about child care, and I am being incredibly so. She'll be 16 weeks old. Even the choice to return is mine; I don't have to do this at all.

And yet...

My mantra this week: I don't have to do this. If it doesn't work for our family, I can change my mind. We'll just see how it goes.

At Three Months

2010-10-04T12:54:00.010-05:00

At almost exactly this time three months ago we met face to face for the first time, you and I. It would be hours more before we'd get to spend any time together, thanks to my fever, but already I could see your face in my mind with no effort at all. Three months later, I know your face and the many emotions that cross it better than I know my own.

There have been a lot of emotions to see. This has been your fussy month. I didn't realize just how fussy you'd been, really, until we spent last weekend at Aunt Megan's and Grandma got to see you first thing in the morning. You are always at your happiest after a good night of sleep, and she was amazed by just how cheerful and content you were. Its true; you have been a little high maintenance recently. Its been a month of sinus congestion and ear aches for you, and so we've had to work a little harder at keeping you entertained and make sure you stay on a good sleep schedule.

Thankfully, we seem to have that worked out, you and I. You are napping very well now. Three times a day you fall asleep with only a little help from me, and you wake up promptly one hour later. (We already knew you had a calendar, and now you seem to have an alarm clock, too.) And at night, you let me know around 7 that its time to start the bedtime routine. A warm bath, nightgown and nursing later and you're dreaming sweet dreams. The next step, though, will be letting someone other than me put you down for bed.

And, because you're sleeping better or perhaps just because you're getting older, you are even happier and more fun when you are feeling well. You still love best to play with us, and you express your joy with your whole body. You can scoot yourself backwards and forwards now, and you're a breath away from rolling over from your back. You also spend even more time on your play mat - grabbing the toys, looking at the animals printed on it or just quietly watching the light and listening to the music. The other day you even decided to nap there. You were laughing and playing, and then suddenly you stretched, rolled over to your side and went to sleep.

We spend alot of time out of the house, too. You love our long walks and spend hours on the Avenue with me. We even had our first play date this month. You loved watching our friend, who is almost two, run around the park and play. I loved watching you follow her with your eyes, bouncing excitedly on our laps and laughing. You are just so much fun.

This is our last month of spending all our time together. In a few weeks, I'll be going back to work for a few hours a day, and someone will be coming to stay with you while I'm gone. While I really believe this is the best balance for us, I'm sure going to miss all this uninterrupted time with you.

Fits and Starts

2010-09-18T08:30:00.000-05:00

It's not that I have no time to craft. I could easily take 15 minutes of her naptime or ask my husband to take over for an hour after he gets home. I just don't seem to be able to focus, and so the short spurts I can do aren't getting me very far.
I've almost finished the great Orchid the super-talented Julie designed and kindly taught us at our last guild meeting. I was too distracted by the munchkin on my lap to listen to directions well at the meeting, so I took mine apart to start over at home in the quiet. Its honestly a 15 minute project, but after doing the hard part I stalled. Why? Because I have to remember to get out a little batting and the glue gun when the baby isn't sleeping in that room. Its been in this state for almost two weeks now. Lame. Maybe I'll finish it this afternoon in honor of the guild's Sew Day. It will eventually get finished, because I have plans to use it as part of a Christmas gift. Of course, that will also need to get made eventually...
I also have big dreams of a liberated stars quilt, using the technique taught in the second edition of Liberated Quiltmaking. Or at least to make some star blocks. This is as far as I've gotten. Again, I've been working on this for weeks. If you can call what I've been doing 'working on' it. Mostly I've been fingering these blocks that I cut out several weeks ago and dreaming about the quilt.
My knitting is actually faring a little better, because this is a project I can do with the munchkin on my lap or half spaced out in front of the TV while her Dad has her. This is a prayer pocket for the knitting ministry we have started at church. I haven't made it to a group knit since before the baby was born, but at least I've knit a few rows. Quite a few really. I'm letting the other knitting projects, the ones that take brain power, languish, but this little bit of crafty caring is progressing.

Mostly, though, I'm focused on the munchkin who is developing almost faster than I keep up. That's okay. I figure she's by far the most important project I've ever taken on. And its not like I can relegate her to the UFO pile when I'm not in the mood!

The Royal Court

2010-09-11T12:36:00.000-05:00

Gwen would like it known that, yes, she is learning to share, thank you very much. And what do you mean does she mind not being the princess of the house anymore? She already has the baby trained to insist on multiple walks a day, doesn't she?

At Two Months

2010-09-10T13:30:00.001-05:00

Two months. Two months. Its been a lifetime - your lifetime, specifically - and no time at all. You're a healthy, lively baby girl. Already outgrowing the smallest of your clothes and melting my heart with your dimples. I swear you're growing before our very eyes.

And we know why. You nurse like a champ. No hesitation to latch, and no question you know just where the milk comes from. The sound you make as you take to 'the milk dud' (your father's term, used just as often to describe me frankly) is part greed, part satisfaction. We call you the milk monster, and you've earned the name. You hold on fiercely, fisting my shirt in your tiny hand or gripping at my skin with your fingertips, and gaze up at me with big blue-gray eyes. Every once in awhile you smile without letting go. It kills me every time.

Not nearly so winning is your new refusal to really nap. You've taken to sleeping for half an hour or less during the day, often cat napping in my arms but jerking awake at the slightest movement. This leads inevitably to an overtired baby who whines, fusses and eventually cries inconsolably until finally, finally falling asleep at night. Some times you can't even find your way to bedtime on your own, and Dad or I end up dancing with you until the rhythm finally soothes you and you drop off. But, we're starting a new routine, you and I. I'm trying to learn to read your cues that you're getting tired and develop cues for nap time that tell you its time to sleep now. You learned the nighttime cues so quickly; I am hoping we'll have an easy time passing through this stage now that I'm recognizing it for what it is.

And it will be so worth it when we get these naps worked out. You are simply charming when you wake up fresh from a good sleep. You grin and laugh, reach out for us with sheer joy. The world is still a fascinating place, and when you're feeling good you are so very interested in it. That's the best time for your tummy time or to lay on our backs and watch the ceiling fan. You aren't a fan of being left on your own, but you'll lay there if I'm playing with you.

Boy do we play these days. We spend more time at your play mat, as you slowly gain the coordination to hit the toys and hear their noise. Its a game you find as absorbing as you do frustrating. You love 'Head and Shoulders, Knees and Toes.' We play it so often your Dad has found himself humming it at work. And now we've added 'The Wheels on the Bus' accompanied by the bicycle move that helps with the gas. (Oh, the gas. You're still so bothered by this, sometimes crying out in your sleep. We've already passed the magic six week mark, when Grandma thought it would go away, and now we're waiting for three months when our friends have said it will pass. We're still hoping.) And your delighted when your Dad flies you like an airplane or I bend my knees and put you tummy down on them so you can wave your arms or bend your knees to move up and down.

But, what you love best is just to talk with us. I rest you on my knees and read books to you or tell you the nursery rhymes I now have memorized. You watch me with serious eyes and then break in to the biggest grin. Or you'll watch soccer with your Dad, earnestly listening while he explains strategy to you and simply fascinated by all the bright colors and movement. Sometimes you talk back to us, cooing and vocalizing with the best of them.

You still prefer the outdoors, though. Now that the weather is finally changing we spend most of our early mornings out under the grapefruit tree. Dad and I drink our coffee, and you happily sit with us and watch the world. Some mornings I take a book outside and we just stay there, even after Dad has left us to go to work. Or we take the dog and go for a long walk through the neighborhood, looking to see what is happening in our little world. We sometimes take two or three walks in the day, even walking down to Park Avenue to window shop or sit in the park. Your love of the outdoors makes it hard to deny you.

Its hard to deny you anything, frankly. You're alot of work, child of mine, and I rather suspect you always will be. But, its a result of your curious, alert nature and that is exactly what makes you so amazing to watch. We took our first overnight trip - to Baba and Dado's house - on the day you turned two months. You took in the new environment, the big dogs and even your first dip in a swimming pool with huge eyes and curious hands. It was a little overwhelming it seemed, and you preferred to do your exploring from my arms or your Dad's. But, your Dado won you over with his willingness to endlessly show you the wonders of his garden. And your endless fascination with it would have won him over, if he hadn't already been yours.

Just like the rest of us.

This post has been sitting in drafts, delayed by an increase in fussiness and a decrease in sleep. A trip to the doctor (for your first shots, poor thing) reveals fluid behind your ear drum. Your current trouble sleeping may be as much about an earache as a nap routine. Baby Tylenol resulted in the first long sleep you've had in two weeks. Now, if you'd just fall asleep for your afternoon nap...

Primary Day

2010-08-24T18:57:00.004-05:00

The polling place was the Lions Club just a few blocks from our house, always staffed with silver-haired citizens from a time when civic duty was takenvery seriously. My Mom would step in to the booth, slide closed the heavy drapery smelling slightly of the dust that had collected since the last election, carefully make her selections and pull the handle of the (now infamous) punch card machine. She always voted, and I always got to be there. Sometimes she would let me pull the handle, breaking the rules I'm sure.

I haven't missed voting in an election since I turned 18, all through school making my decisions based on the huge envelope of clippings Mom sent and carefully completing my absentee ballot. These days my polling place is the recreation center at the top of my street, perfect for walking to with a cup of coffee. Its always staffed by members of the Orlando Ball

et, whom I understand have taken on the responsibility for many years. I walk up to a booth that reminds me of a plastic version of the carrels from my high school library, and I carefully make my selections and fill in the bubble with a black pen.

Today my daughter went with me.

Already

2010-08-21T09:11:00.003-05:00

Already she looks less like a newborn and more like a baby. The dimple in her cheek has been joined by dimples at her elbows and knees. Her hands and feet are still oh so small, but no longer are they the impossibly fragile hands and long feet of a newborn. Now she has plump little hands that grasp tightly to my shirt, and round feet she uses to dance. She curls her body in to mine, and she is such a soft little bundle. Oh my, how fast it goes...already.

The Naptime Dress

2010-08-16T09:08:00.003-05:00

There's a special little girl in my life who, at 10 months old, hasn't yet received a handcrafted gift. That clearly had to be corrected. She has also generously passed on all her clothes to my little firecracker as she outgrows them, so a dress was the obvious choice* when I finally sat down to make her something. (Its a given that her quilt will have to wait a bit longer, right?)
This pretty little frock fit the bill. Simple enough to be made in a few naptimes, and pretty enough to be special. Add in a few great fabrics from my local quilt shop, and you have a dress that speaks of my love for the little girl for whom its meant.
And made with snaps, it is fully reversible. Two dresses for the effort of one, a lovely gift for a special girl, and some simple sewing for a new Mama - perfect. It feels good.

*Though it occurs to me as I write this that I made a dress for a little one who is crawling. Not good planning.

To My Daughter

2010-08-04T13:16:00.007-05:00

You're one month old today, and already I can't remember what life was like before you.

Our family has become your very own paparazzi, and you already talk to everyone on skype. Most newborns don't start their mornings with video chats, but half of your adoring audience lives over seas. Its not all about distance, though. Daddy sometimes calls us from work, just so he can see your little face and maybe show you off to a friend.

But, its not really surprising. You're very entertaining for such a tiny one. The world is fascinating, and you are so alert. You watch us with big, serious eyes and then suddenly break in to a grin. You'll even smile at us, reacting to a playful tone of voice. I know the books all say that smiles at this age are gas or coincidence, but even the skeptics have had to agree you're smiling at us.

Some times, for no apparent reason, you'll purse your lips, open your eyes wide and stick out your neck, giving you the look of an adorable baby turtle.

You know your Daddy's voice, turning to look for him when he comes home after work... You are a Daddy's girl, already, and its so sweet to see that I can't regret it.

As long as the world stays interesting, you stay happy. I can't sit still with you for too long. You want to be entertained, and since you don't yet interact with toys I am responsible for your entertainment. So, we're constantly changing positions or locations, trying something new, and looking for ways to keep your busy little mind happy. In the last few days, you've gotten the hang of consistently getting your hand in to your mouth and started sucking on your fingers. This seems to keep you busy for a few minutes.

Don't be in too much of a hurry to make me expendable, though. I don't really mind entertaining you. Fortunately, you like almost anything. You don't protest tummy time as much as I expected, and you easily push yourself up on your arms to look around. You're so strong, holding your head up and looking around for long minutes. Really, you've been doing that from the time we brought you home, but I still can't get over it. You're pulling your legs up in to a crawling position, too, already checking out how all these muscles work and trying to get things coordinated. I'm starting to wonder if you're going to be athletic, definitely a trait you won't get from me.

Yesterday you rolled over from your stomach to your back. Repeatedly. I want to savor this time, when you're so tiny and all ours, but here you are growing before my very eyes. Its probably a good thing you're a quick learner, though. I think you may take after your Aunt Megan, because it makes you so mad when you don't have the skills yet to do something you want to do.

You love the outdoors. Whether its taking a walk, sitting in our yard or just look out the window, you are entertained. If you're fussy and need soothing, all I have to do is walk outside and you magically stop. Of course, the second I step back in to the air-conditioned house the fussing starts again. You don't seem to care that this is mid-summer in Florida.

We're grateful that you save most of the fussing for the day. Somehow, you've figured out night is for sleeping and usually can be counted on to sleep from around 10 pm to just a little before 7 am, waking up every three hours to nurse and then falling right back to sleep. You're remarkably good at self-soothing, putting yourself to sleep when I put you down sleepy. During the day is a little more erratic, and some days you hardly seem to sleep at all. Then there are other days when you do nothing but sleep, though you often insist on doing so on my chest.

Your one real complaint about the world so far would be when you have too much gas. Then you are awake day and night, telling us that you hurt with a plaintive cry that breaks our hearts. Your Daddy has become an expert at the massage that helps you deal with it, and Mama helps too, if with a bit less skill. You seem to understand, pulling your legs up to help us, and you take the gas drops without complaint, too. Grandma swears that the gas always gets better at 6 weeks, and we're holding her to that.

***

You just woke up from the nap you've been taking on my chest, and you're sitting up against my hands looking for all the world like a miniature adult. I said 'hi' to you and you grinned back up at me, showing the little dimple in your cheek. Is it any wonder I'm completely in love with you?

Morning

2010-07-21T07:01:00.002-05:00

I want to remember.

After nursing, a drop of milk still resting in the corner of your mouth, you lie beside me on the bed. My body instinctively curls around your tiny frame. Your feet, crossed at the ankles as is your habit, rest on my thigh. Your wide eyes watch the sunlight streaming through the window above us, and your hand idly rubs against my skin. Every once in a while you stretch luxuriously, but always your little body comes back to rest against mine. Together we wake up slowly.

Nature Girl

2010-07-20T06:35:00.003-05:00

When she's fussy, too tired to sleep or just bored, all I have to do to soothe her is step outside. She loves to be outside and quiets instantly. Sometimes she'll fall asleep, but most of the time she looks around her with wide eyes.

I try to imagine what its like to feel the warm summer breeze on your face for the first time, to look at our neighborhood with those new eyes. How does she understand those tree branches dancing over her head or the sound of the children on the playground down the street? Neighbors get a second look, but she ignores the dogs that pass us on our walk. Is it instinct that the noisy car passing by doesn't warrant her attention, but the call of the Osprey swooping over us causes her to curl protectively in to my chest? She's learning so much about her world already. I wish she could tell me what she thinks.

A Moment

2010-07-16T17:37:00.002-05:00

We've had 24 hour a day help from family since we came home, with one family member literally handing off to another. I can't quite imagine how we would have gotten through those first days, when I could barely use my abdominal muscles and we were all very, very tired from our journey to become a family, without them.

But tonight I'm feeling much like my old self and things are slowly coming back to normal. So, we found ourselves alone at home for awhile - just the three of us for the first time. I was at the stove cooking dinner, he was on the phone, and the baby was watching it all from her bouncy chair. And then, the inevitable, the wail of a dirty diaper. We met eyes, silently deciding which parent was in the best position to handle it. (Him.)

And butterflies fluttered in my stomach. This is ours. Our child. Our life...

Happy 4th

2010-07-16T06:49:00.003-05:00

Our little Firecracker, born July 4, 2010 at a healthy 7 lbs. 6 ozs.

Her arrival was a rougher journey than we'd planned, but some things are worth whatever it takes to get them. Being her Mom? Worth every bit of it.

Waiting: Day Five

2010-07-03T07:52:00.006-05:00

My family comes over to play.

Waiting: Day Four

2010-07-01T17:07:00.003-05:00

Mary Jane booties to match the Matinee sweater.

Waiting: Day Three

2010-06-30T19:47:00.003-05:00

Feeling restless today I re-packed the hospital bag, went to Target for new pillows and generally acted like something was happening that I should be prepared for. Then a dear friend, in town from New York, came to visit and saved me from myself. Followed by dinner out with my indulgent husband, it was the perfect remedy to the restlessness.

Waiting: Day Two

2010-06-29T18:07:00.004-05:00

Finished.

And I'm glad I took the time to pay attention to details like zig zag finishing the inside edges, changing thread colors when needed, and learning to properly use bias binding to finish the top. The small time commitment of baby clothes are a great opportunity for me to really learn those skills.

Waiting: Day One

2010-06-28T19:39:00.003-05:00

I am officially on maternity leave, and the baby is officially not here. So, in addition to many hours spent sleeping and reading, I am filling my day with little projects.

Today's project was finishing the little kimono pajamas I've been wanting to make for weeks. The pants are finished, but I ran in to a problem with my plan to use store bought binding so I could use the blue trim despite not having enough yardage. Apparently, Coats & Clark and Amy Butler do not agree on the definition of 1/2" bias binding. I wasn't willing to venture out to the store by the time I realized that, so this may spill over in to tomorrow's project.

Slow Crafting

2010-06-15T18:58:00.003-05:00

While I greatly admire expectant Mama's who churn out adorable baby items for 9 months, I am clearly not that Mama. I do much less crafting when pregnant. I'm too tired, too preoccupied with the rest of the to do list, and just too disinterested in doing anything that can't be done from the couch.
But, I did think she should have more than just two gowns from her Mama, so this weekend I cut out the pieces for little kimono PJs. The pattern is from Amy Butler's Little Stitches for Little Ones. I love her adult patterns and they always go together so easily, so I'm hoping this will be an easy sew. And that I'll get back to it before next weekend.

I am making great progress on this adorable Matinee Sweater from The Expectant Knitter. Its an easy knit, and that I can do from the couch. Or the bed. Or the waiting room. I did knit her another sweater, but I don't like how it came out and I'll probably never put it on her. But this little cardigan, which I'm knitting with bamboo yarn, looks like just the thing to fight the air conditioning chill.
I've also spent alot of time pondering how to make a sling from these fabrics. I bought the bird fabric at least three years ago with an apron pattern in mind. When I decided it wasn't right for that project, I put it away with a baby sling in mind. And then waited several years to get pregnant. Except, now that I am pregnant, all the patterns were for longer lengths of fabric and said you should have a fabric that doesn't have a wrong side. So, could I make it with a lining or would that be too thick for the rings? And, can I skip that extra 1/4 yard they call for, since I'm small? My list of questions was endless, and since some of this is actually about safety it seemed like just experimenting was a bad idea. So, I finally emailed a friend with actual expertise in such things* and begged for advice. And she promptly offered to make it for me as a baby gift. Score!

* True expertise - as in she actually made and sold slings to real customers. I bought one as a baby gift years ago, and it was gorgeous. The Mama said it was really comfortable, too. I don't think she's specializing anymore, but you could ask about a commission through the Etsy shop she and her husband share. You should keep an eye on their shop anyway. Really cool things pop up in there whenever they find a minute for crafting in the midst of life and raising beautiful children.

Still Nesting

2010-05-22T16:30:00.004-05:00

We're still spending alot of time cleaning, rearranging and generally trying to fit all the kid gear in to our house. It doesn't help that all this finally got us motivated to install a ceiling fan, fix some plumbing and basically deal with a bunch of other household chores that we'd been ignoring. And, of course, this meant turning upside down the work we'd already done so it almost has to be re-done.

In all of that, I haven't done much sewing. Mother's Day weekend, appropriately enough, was the exception to that. I finished the hand quilting on her bird quilt, which just needs binding now. And, I made her another gown. This is the same drawstring gown pattern. Clearly, this is my current comfort pattern.

I think I may be done with it now, though. The adorable kimono patterns are really calling my name...

Family

2010-05-05T17:20:00.008-05:00

When we were growing up, my mother would often tell my sister and I that the only person you get for your whole life is your sister. It was important to her that we have a close relationship, despite a six year age difference and natural sibling rivalry. Her ploy

worked. There is no relationship in my life quite like the one I have with my sister.

So, this week was incredibly special. She had one week between semesters in graduate school, and she came to spend it helping me re-arrange the house and set up the nursery. I took the first half of the week off, giving us five full days to focus on all things baby. Most of the time it was just the two of us, and it was a great chance to be together and share the excitement.

And we did a great job, if I do say so myself.But, best of all, I got to share this incredibly exciting time with my sister. She listened to the baby's heartbeat, felt her kicks and swore she could see my belly grow before her very eyes.

One Down

2010-04-21T19:18:00.000-05:00

adorable fabric on the clearance table + an urgent need to have it become a gown for my little girl = antidote to my fear of sewing knits

I definitely have to learn more about edging, but since this is newborn size I don't think she'll be complaining. And its a thrill to this pregnant mama's heart.

Where I Try to Find Words and Fail

2010-04-20T18:13:00.004-05:00

I've been trying for a month now to find words for what I'm feeling. Since there is absolutely no missing the baby belly now, I get asked how I'm feeling at least once an hour. My habitual answer is 'great.' And I am. This has been a very easy pregnancy for a desperately wanted baby. I got my wish for a girl, and she has a name. I've knit her a few things and sewn her the cutest little gown. She has two quilt tops that are *this close* to being quilts. Its amazing. And wonderful. And, well, great.

And yet... this preparation? its alot of work, isn't it? My wonderful friends and family have planned baby showers. Three of them, in fact. So, the registry had to get done and so many decisions had to be made. I was amazed by how long it took. And what will be her bedroom has been my work room and our general storage room. So, before I can get to the joy of decorating the nursery I have to clear out that room. And I'm not really sure what to do with that stuff, not to mention that her father and I don't necessarily agree about whether one large piece of furniture can stay in there with her.* Plus it gets harder and harder to bend over to clean things out. And this has been generally not. fun.

That's not really it, though. No, I am not enjoying all the cleaning and reorganizing. I hate living in the cluttered maze of furniture and boxes that inevitably fill up the house during a transition like this. But, I've done it before and with much better grace. In fact, after some help putting together a big bookshelf next weekend, I probably only need another hour or two to have things to the point that the room can be painted. And then my sister is coming to spend several days helping me set up the nursery and create a work space for myself downstairs. I should be feeling relieved and getting excited about the fun part now. And I am. Kind of.

This feels different than just my environment is in disarray. It is different. The fact that her basted and marked quilt is sitting here without a stitch in it nearly two weeks later, two weeks in which of done plenty of couch sitting, says alot about how much inertia I feel. And yet, I am excited about this baby and the fact that she'll be here in 11 weeks or so. I am.

So, a month after I first tried to write this post, and I still can't find the words.

I'm blaming it on the hormones.

*Let me hasten to say that he's said it goes, if I say it goes. He's not arguing with me over anything I want to do. Its just that he's repeatedly asked why it has to go, whether we'd really be able to find something smaller that would still serve the purpose and 'just why are we moving that big thing again'. I know he both believes those things and really doesn't want to move it since it will be a serious pain in his rear, and while I really want it out of there I'm not sure he doesn't have a point. We've agreed it stays until the baby furniture is in there and I start trying to arrange it. If I can't make it work in a way I'm happy with, he'll get rid of it.

New Quilt, New Friends, New Furniture

2010-03-22T19:28:00.002-05:00

I've always been a solitary quilter, but I love the history of quilting as a community event, a chance for women to bond over fabric and thread. And now I'm creating my place in that great history. Saturday was National Quilting Day, and it was also the first sewing day for the Orlando Modern Quilt guild. Have sewing machine, will travel. I packed up my gear and spent a wonderful day quilting and making new friends. And with their advice, I finished up the baby's quilt and resisted the urge to add more raw edge applique. Its good to have others around to help you stop when its done. Now I'm on the hunt for the perfect backing.

And this is what happens when you order couches from Ikea. Consider yourself warned. But, my wonderful husband and brother-in-law put them together with no swearing and a minimum of grumbling. They look great (that's the love seat under the quilt in the first photo) and we're so relieved to have finally found couches we both love. They're perfect for napping, too.

At 32 weeks

2010-03-08T20:34:00.000-05:00

For the last few weeks, I've found myself saying that "I just feel so pregnant." I continue to be blessed with a remarkably easy pregnancy, so I'm definitely not complaining. It does sneak up on me, though. I'm not sleeping well and so by the end of the day my body just feels so heavy that all I want to do is lie down. Speaking of heavy, this daughter of mine seems to have had her 2nd trimester growth spurt and my belly feels so stretched and big. My back hurts, just a nagging ache that I know is about both not finding a good sleeping position and that heavy belly. I am amazed by my appetite, and the constant heartburn that accompanies it. (If this kid isn't born with a head full of hair, I'm going to be shocked.) The baby still does cartwheels through my uterus, but her new favorite game is to wedge herself in to a corner where she becomes a very painful lump. And yet... its so cool. It must be the only time when physical discomfort is as thrilling as it is uncomfortable. There's a person growing in there.

And I'm her Mom. I realized today that I've stopped thinking of myself as just a pregnant woman, and I've started to think of myself as her mother. I'm guessing its something about the reality of the growing belly and the strong movements. But, whatever it is, there is no question that I feel like a mother now. And I will never again not be a mother. Even if tragedy should strike, she will always have been my child and me her mother. I know this feeling will grow and that what it means to me will change dramatically come July, and then again a hundred times after. But for right now, I'm just trying to wrap my mind around what my heart already knows. I'm a mother.

Baby's Quilt

2010-02-26T20:17:00.002-05:00

My first 'improvisational' quilt seems to be just about done, and I think it might just be for the baby. Bright colors, lots of patterns, birds - looks like baby doesn't it?

The three little bird patches in the brown stripe will be rough edge appliqued, which will add some texture for little fingers. I think it needs a brown border, though. I've pretty much settled on that. And I'm toying with the idea of rough edge appliqueing little patches on the brown border too. Just enough to add the extra texture and some visual interest, but still leave some space for the eye to rest. This quilt is definitely at risk of getting too busy.

This quilt may have stalled for awhile, but its definitely taking a life of its own now. Here's hoping I have time and energy to finish it up this weekend.

Motivation

2010-02-18T20:15:00.002-05:00

That growing belly and the increasingly strong (and oh so frequent) kicks remind me that this baby will outgrow my body in the next twenty weeks, give or take. I have never known stronger motivation to keep to my gym schedule. I want to be healthy for myself and this baby. I need the strength to care for this baby when she arrives. I feel better when I go to the gym. But, what gets me there after a long day at work, is the reality that labor is just around the corner. And so, I go.

* This photo is me fresh from a work out. Perhaps not the prettiest pregnancy photo we've taken, but definitely among the most accurate.

at 17 weeks

2010-01-22T14:13:00.000-05:00

I want to remember...

:: my hand resting on the swell of my tummy without thought, part of me always aware

:: how my husband's excitement fills every corner of our life

:: his tenderness with me and how very anchored in our marriage I feel, so strongly a couple as we stand on the cusp of becoming three

:: that life seems the same, is the same, but the world feels different

:: wondering how I never noticed before the huge responsibility of naming
:: how the aches and twinges are suddenly signs of a miracle
:: waiting impatiently for those first flutterings, the quickening

Christmas Quilt

2010-01-17T17:31:00.002-05:00

The quilt was finished in time for Christmas and, as predicted, the recipient loves it. It came out just as I had envisioned, and the hand work was just what I was in the mood for.

Other than the quilt, I've pretty much just been laying around. I'm growing a whole other person in my body, and I figure that's work enough. My body thinks it is whether or not I do anyway. Last night I fell asleep on the couch, while our friend was still here. I didn't wake up until after she left.

While laying on the couch isn't conducive to sewing, at least when I don't have any hand sewing to do, it is conducive to knitting. I've started a baby sweater, the Shawl Collar Sweater from The Expectant Knitter, and in a week I've finished the front. Expect knitting photos soon!

Well, not too soon, since apparently my complete laziness also extends to blogging.

Less Really is More

2009-12-17T20:21:00.005-05:00

This Christmas I'm embracing the 'less is more' theme. Slowing down and taking the time to savor the season, enjoy the anticipation and keep my own pace.The halls are decked and beautiful. But, many of the decorations remain in their box. Cookies are baked and delivered to co-workers, a task I enjoyed over several days.

I am close to finishing one fantastic handmade gift that will delight the recipient. And that's all I plan to make this year.

Next week I'm on vacation. I have plans to revel in the season with more cookie baking, gift wrapping, and Christmas Carols playing through the house. Its a great Christmas this year.

Seriously?

2009-11-20T07:00:00.001-05:00

I found this in my drafts - a post I wrote in August and then never finished. It still made me laugh, and shake my head in disbelief, so I decided to publish it now for your entertainment. And maybe you can tell me where I can move that I won't have to deal with fleas.

(Assistant on the phone behind our examining room.)

Okay, that's a tape worm you saw. We can give you something for her.

.....

No, they're not transmitted between pets. They get them from fleas.

.....

Well, fleas are very, very small. If you look around the base of her tail, you'll see little black specks. Those are fleas.

At this point, I pick my jaw up off the floor at the idea someone doesn't know what fleas look like and leave the room with the tech for a different test. I am gone for two or three full minutes, and when I get back she is suggesting he bring the dog in the next morning and she'll show him what a flea looks like.

(Assistant to the Tech who has gone back)

He's going to bring her in tomorrow, so we can give him dewormer and show him what a flea looks like.

He really didn't know what a flea looks like?

No, he said that he saw them when he went to the dog park; that they were flying around there.

Um, yeah. If its flying around, its not a flea.

I'm still thinking about it, and trying to figure out how it is that a dog owner doesn't know what fleas look like. He can't be from Florida. Are there really places where you own animals and can't identify a flea?

Odds and Ends

2009-11-19T12:00:00.000-05:00

My Ribby Sweater is finished and fits over my head. Its been finished for months, actually. It was ready in time to take to Bulgaria, and it got alot of wear there. Just not when anyone was taking photos of me, apparently. Now that we're getting cooler weather here, at least in fits and spurts, its starting to get wear here. I still don't have a good photo of it, but since you can see its a sweater and I'm wearing it I'm posting it.

I've started a Christmas gift quilt (for a family member, none of whom read my blog or even remember I have it) that is way outside my comfort zone. Its super simplistic and modern, stretch number one. And it involves curved piecing, stretch number two. Each half circle block (half circle, not the whole circle) takes me close to an hour. Whew. Thankfully, I'm only planning on four circles. The rest of the quilt is just a big block of the gold. I think I'm going to like it, and I know I'm going to be proud of it. (And its exactly the recipients style, so I know she'll love it.)

I'm considering seeking out a machine quilter for this one. I've never done that before. But, I'm going to feel rushed by the fact that I really want to give it for Christmas, and my quilting skills aren't all that great to start with. With the big expanse of solid gold to fill in, I think my stitches will really show and I'm not sure I can live up to that. I haven't decided, though. The opportunity to do some fun quilting in that big expanse of gold is also pretty hard to pass up.

How to Shorten Your Doggy Life Span

2009-10-28T06:10:00.002-05:00

Its a good thing she's cute, because the little dog is doing nothing to help my efforts to get more sleep. Mostly its been small things, like waking me up to help her get back under her blanket, but the other night she took it to an entirely new level.

She sleeps on a large pillow with a fuzzy blanket to curl up in. I always put her pillow on the floor right below me (see above for tendency to wake me up to help with her blanket). Apparently, she woke up the other night and wandered around doing whatever it is she does in the middle of the night. I half registered the clicking of her little nails on the floor, but I was most definitely asleep. Until, that is, she tried to return to her pillow. All of a sudden she was snarling and squealing, the frightened snarl she gives when she is in danger or really upset with Lily. I woke up with a rush of adrenaline, and Alex immediately flipped on our bed light. Had an animal gotten in to the house? Was she hurt? No, she was running away from her pillow, and then she stopped and looked around, confused.

There was nothing and noone there. Nothing. She had scared herself. I'm guessing she touched her furry blanket (the one she sleeps under every. single. night.) and thought someone was in her bed. After a little reassurance from us, she settled down and went right to sleep. I, on the other hand, was awake for an hour as I waited for the adrenaline rush to subside. It was 12:45 in the morning.

It's a good thing she's cute.

Venturing in to a New World

2009-10-15T20:47:00.003-05:00

My low battery light has been blinking for weeks. I don't know where the energy sucks is, but its sure draining out of me at an alarming rate. The fatigue was the final push I needed, though, to venture in to the world of eastern medicine. Several people whose opinions I trust have urged me to try acupuncture. This week I finally did. Diagnosis: I have a kidney/liver imbalance, which has nothing to do with my actual kidneys and liver but is instead a water/wood imbalance. Yeah, I don't understand it either. I just told myself this is a completely different framework for understanding the world and you should just go with it.

I didn't know what to expect, but when the doctor had me feel the needle I was startled. It was thin and flexible, and felt more a hairbrush bristle than any needle I've ever touched. She inserted them at strategic points (the rhyme and reason to which I couldn't discern, but pretty much correlating to the spots the massage therapist always focuses on) with a little tapping motion. They just barely broke the skin and didn't hurt at all, with the notable exception of one spot on my hand she warned me would sting. Frankly I prick myself with needles and pins much harder than that on a regular basis. I didn't realize she'd leave them in so long, but soft music was playing and it was a nice excuse to lay still and just let my mind wander. I wasn't at all uncomfortable, so it was almost a nap.

About half way through, she also used cupping on my right leg, where I have the most inflammation in my muscle. I'm sure there was another explanation for what was happening there in eastern medicine, probably blocked qi or something similar. Again, I'm acknowledging this is a framework I don't share and just going with it. But, I can tell you that western medicine says that's exactly where I have alot of inflammation. It was just gentle sucking pressure.

I can't say that I feel dramatically different now, but then again one treatment is rarely enough to change anything significantly. I do notice that today, when we're having a huge weather change, my leg barely hurts at all and most of my aches are in my shoulders and spine. (She focused on my leg, because that was my primary complaint when I went in. That and the blasted fatigue, which is definitely not better yet.) All in all, not a big deal and worth a try.

Though, I was a little weirded out when she used a needle right between my eyes.

A Lark

2009-10-11T19:05:00.000-05:00

This is the project on my design wall this weekend. The design wall I created specifically to be able to do this project.* I've always had a well-defined plan before starting a quilt. Not necessarily a pattern, but always a clear plan where I've done some math and drawn out a sketch. But this week I launched in to a completely improvisational quilt. It started with the large bird in the middle and one of the rail fence sparrows. Then I hung them up on the wall for awhile before deciding to make three more sparrows. That hung overnight, and I'd stop by the sewing room just to look at them hanging on the wall and to occassionally audition ideas for what became the floral pieces this morning. I've never worked on a quilt like this before, and I'm loving it. I find my cutting and piecing is actually significantly more precise, because I'm working in smaller steps. (And I definitely don't miss cutting 125 squares at a time.) And its fun watching the quilt unfold naturally. I don't even know what size its going to be, and its already one of my favorites.** Now I'm contemplating what's next. A 1" brown frame? The bird sillhouettes down the sides? 3" blocks of both or maybe even other fabrics as well?

*By "design wall" I mean a craft size package of batting hung on the wall beside my sewing machine with push pins.
** I'll admit I'm hoping for a lap quilt I can keep on the couch, and not a baby quilt I'll be giving away. But, I honestly don't know yet which it will be and since I'm the one designing that is wild. Follow the fabric...

Items of Interest, at least to me

2009-09-30T02:39:00.004-05:00

Things about Rousse, Bulgaria that will probably surprise or interest you:

Living spaces are small. Appliances are small. Personal space is small. Europe is small. You can get to Vienna from here, by bus, in well under a day. If the cafe is out of tables, someone will ask to share yours. (At least my experience is they will ask; in the german airport they just sit down in your empty chairs.)
Showers are not in a separate space, but are in the middle of the bathroom and the drain in the middle of the floor. I have never seen a bath tub. The toilet may also be in this room, or it may be in a separate room. (I much prefer the latter, so I don't have to figure out how to shower without getting the toilet paper wet.)
If you use a public restroom, there is the possibility that you will need to pay and/or squat.
When you visit someone, you will sit at the table and you will be offered food as well as drink. You should accept, because if you don't they will just assume they haven't found the right thing to offer you yet.
You will probably spend the evening drinking, discussing politics and swapping jokes. You will be asked for American jokes; I suggest you do some research because you won't remember any on the spot.
If you ask, there's a good chance that any cafe or restaurant will have a menu in English and the server may very well speak some English.
The waiter or waitress, however, will probably be intimidating. Its less scary to go in to a small store than to try and order coffee at a cafe. They also expect to be largely ignored by the customer, and if you ask their name or initiate any conversation it will be a surprise. For some it is a pleasant surprise.
Regular coffee here means espresso. They will probably have nescafe and might have cappuccino. They will not have drip coffee. I don't know that they even know what a latte is.
Pizza will probably have corn on it. And maybe an egg.
Bulgarians are still pissed off about the time they spent under the rule of the Ottoman Empire, which they call the Ottoman Yoke, and they build monuments to the revolutionaries and soldiers that helped free them.
This is because it lasted 500 years - this is more than twice as long as our country has existed.
They do not consider themselves in any way, shape or form, Turkish or related to the Turks. And muslims are very much a minority. 500 years or no.
Many gypsys live in Bulgaria and always have. They are not considered romantic or exotic, and though their music has had significant influence many Bulgarians still have mixed feelings about it.
This is very much a cash economy. Most stores don't have cash registers. The person in charge of taking the money simply has a purse or wallet from which they make change and where they keep the money.
I can not figure out if we pay tax on anything other than electronics, and it seems to be factored in to the price advertised. Maybe. I'm still a little confused on this issue.
Family is huge and sprawling. Your parent's cousin is your uncle, and your cousin's child your nephew. There is a term to define the relationship between you and your child's mother-in-law. It is very common to call someone by their title (wife, brother) when addressing them or talking about them. I wonder if this is because names are recycled so much within families.
There are parks absolutely everywhere and the children run free in them until 10 or 11 at night. Most restaurants have a play area for the children, and it is expected they will be running and playing. After age 5 or so, parents only expect them to check in every half hour or so and older children much less often than that. However, any older person feels free to correct a child that is not behaving properly.
The soil is amazingly rich. Flowers, vegetables and grape vines are grown all around the base of apartment buildings.
Stray dogs and cats roam the city and are routinely fed at restaurants. They are immunized, spayed/neutered and released by the city unless they become aggressive. They are not aggressive and I have not seen any animal waste in a public space. Pet dogs are kept on leashes at all times.

Well, crud

2009-09-13T14:00:00.002-05:00

The Ribby Pulli sweater has been washed and blocked for awhile, but what with the 90 degree heat I haven't been ready to try it on. Today, as I finally started pulling clothes to pack for Bulgaria, I decided to try it on before putting it in the suitcase. It does not fit over my head. No, its not a bit snug or uncomfortable. No, getting it wet and stretching doesn't help. It's not close. It. Does. Not. Fit.

*Sigh*

So, I'm spending my football knitting time today ripping out the funnel neck, picking up stitches - more of them and with a larger needle size - and trying again. I guess that answers the question of what knitting I want to put in my carry on.

How did she do?

2009-09-01T08:38:00.000-05:00

Nothing. Nada. Zip.

And you know, I'm okay with that. It was another crazy week. I was exhausted and run down. Rest was (and frankly is) much more essential at the moment.

Lazy Sunday

2009-08-30T19:28:00.003-05:00

Today has been a lazy, lazy Sunday. The sum total of my activities for the day include: knitting, drinking coffee, eating, reading a magazine, emailing a few friends, taking the dog to the dog park, going to the grocery store and joining Facebook. Several of those activities have appeared repeatedly through the day though. Mostly the knitting and coffee drinking. If you'd excuse me, I must get back to my busy schedule of knitting now. :)

Wow it feels great to get some rest.

Dreams Deferred

2009-08-24T19:37:00.002-05:00

I have so many sewing projects swimming around in my imagination.

There's the adorable kimono-inspired outfit for the new baby who will be joining us in Octoberish. After all, my friends were kind enough to give me the girl I requested. I have to make some adorable clothes for her. (I love their little boy, but boys just aren't as much fun to sew clothes for.)

I've also been planning a gym bag for myself. Something that will keep my shoes separate from my clothes, contain my card and lock so I can actually find them without fishing around the bottom of the bag and hopefully look a whole lot cuter than the conference freebie I am currently using.

And last night, as I was hunting through a messy drawer for the right size knitting needle, I was dreaming of a simple circular needle holder.

Oh, and I bought fabric for a quilt for my aunt way back in the Spring. I'm just now feeling like I may have the courage to try my hand at the pattern. (Curved seams. Scary.)

Yep, lots of big plans for me and my sewing machine. And with just a few short weeks before we leave on vacation, what am I doing with my only evening at home for the week? Not sewing, that's for sure. My leg, my right leg - my sewing machine pedal leg - is still hurting. Really hurting. There's no way I can run the machine tonight hurting.

So, while I dream of sewing, I'm knitting. Knitting swatches. Still.

How did she do?

2009-08-24T11:32:00.000-05:00

Wednesday*: cardio, strength building, light yoga
Sunday: 1/2 light gardening, cardio**

* After a stressful morning at work, my reaction was "I need to go to the gym at lunch." I'm excited that the gym is finally getting to be a default for stress management.

** My first time on the elliptical machine. Oh, mama.

Impatient is my middle name.

2009-08-21T18:09:00.003-05:00

Startitis: the compulsive desire to cast on new knitting projects.

I seem to have the opposite of startitis. My least favorite part of a knitting project is the getting started. I hate the endless knitting of gauge swatches while I figure out which size needles I need to use. And pointing out to myself that this is indeed knitting, the exact activity I want to be doing, doesn't seem to change that feeling. I don't particularly like the first rows of a project either. I don't like the fiddliness of getting it established. What I like is the body of the knitting, after the pattern is well established and before all the finishing and weaving in of ends.

Unfortunately, I also like to complete projects. It takes me 9 months to finish a sweater, and quite frankly that's enough of a test of my patience. My enthusiasm for the project definitely begins to wane if it doesn't keep changing, and if there is no end in sight. You will not see me casting on for an afghan any time soon. Which means that I do finish my projects and so, if I want to keep knitting, I eventually have to start new ones.

That's where I'm at today. I've finished all my projects. So, last week I ordered yarn to make a tank top from Knitting in the Sun and sock yarn for a purse project. I really like having a small, portable project in addition to my primary project, so I want to get started with both. But, both are new yarns to me and that means figuring out gauge is taking awhile. I'm very impatient with this. I just want to be knitting the projects now. I'm actually tempted to just cast on for the tank, having come pretty close to gauge with my last try, and I probably would except that I don't own needles in the size I'll need for the ribbing. Of course.

So, I'll be starting another episode of Kyle XY and knitting swatches tonight.

How Did She Do?

2009-08-17T12:26:00.000-05:00

Monday: cardio, strength building and yoga (on my own at the gym)
Wednesday: Wii yoga
Thursday: Cardio
Sunday: Yoga (on my own in the bedroom)

I'll take it.

Carnival Tumblers

2009-08-15T20:48:00.003-05:00

A lazy Saturday turned out to be the inspiration I needed to get back to work on Carnival Tumblers. The top is now fully pieced, and I'm somewhat surprised to find its a baby quilt. The odd shaped pieces gave me some trouble with my math. Its fun, though, and I think the bright colors will make a lovely play quilt for a little girl. I don't think its done, though. It looks like canvas for appliqué to me. But what? Maybe something from the carnival theme. I think I'll set it aside until inspiration hits.

Making Laundry Pretty

2009-08-11T06:27:00.002-05:00

Last week, after a frustrating day at work, I indulged in fabric therapy. In a little less than three hours, I whipped up this bag (very) loosely based on this tutorial I found on-line. It's a laundry bag for a young lady who grew up in foster care and is now headed to college as an honors student. The quiet time with my sewing machine and pretty fabric, a reminder of why I do my job, and the satisfaction of a finished project at the end of a day where I felt I was spinning my wheels - this little project packed alot of punch.

How did she do?

2009-08-10T16:25:00.003-05:00

Thursday: Wii Yoga

My work week unexpectedly fractured in to a dozen meetings of varying sizes, spread out all over central Florida and spilling in to several of the evenings. I was doing my best to keep up, and getting to the gym wasn't in the cards. By the time the weekend came, I wanted a nap much more than a work out.

I'm paying for it, though. My muscles feel so tight that my entire body aches. I managed to pull a muscle in my back during a nap Sunday. Yes, that's what a said - I pulled a muscle napping. You'll have to excuse me now. I need to go to the gym. Obviously.

How did she do?

2009-08-03T20:29:00.002-05:00

Monday: 30 minutes cardio, stretching

Thursday: 20 minutes cardio, stretching

I'm keeping my workouts light, in deference to serious lobbying from my right leg and its friends.

Just Us

2009-08-01T07:59:00.003-05:00

This week Alex suggested a date and took me to a lovely restaurant. We sat by the lake with our drinks while we waited for a table, talking about our day, the weekend to come and nothing in particular. The sun was setting and we could watch a storm blowing up from across the lake. It was a great night.

The Potter's Clay

2009-07-22T07:00:00.000-05:00

My church has started an art ministry, The Potting Shed, to build fellowship and encourage mission. We're making bowls that will be donated to a silent auction for Second Harvest Foodbank and loaf pans that will be used to bake bread we will donate to the Coalition for the Homeless. Last week I started the loaf pans class and had a great time. I've also agreed to be an "Art Angel," helping to glaze and fire bowls as we try to create 300 bowls for the auction.

I've been looking for a way to become more engaged, to connect in a way that makes Church a part of my life. And not just on Sunday morning. But, I've been looking for a way that feels right for me, right now. Presbyterians are famous for their committees, and I'm really not interested in wading my way through the bureaucracies. We're also famous for our philosophy of stewardship, our commitment to mission. And while this is perhaps the tenant that most drew me to the Presbyterian church, my own role in it needs to be balanced with the emotional demands of my profession. But, with my hands in the clay and my sides aching from laughter, I think I've found it. A chance for fellowship, to try something new, and to give without emptying myself. Its been fun.

How did she do?

2009-07-20T06:51:00.000-05:00

Monday: 30 minutes Yoga

I have no idea what happened this week. Monday I was hurting and achy, so I came home and did yoga on the Wii. And then that was it, noting more for the week. I had a few night activities, but really this week wasn't busy enough to keep me from the gym. I'll have to do better this week.

Just Another Saturday Night

2009-07-19T11:25:00.000-05:00

How did she do?

2009-07-14T17:50:00.004-05:00

Tuesday: 30 minutes cardio, stretching

Thursday: 90 minutes heavy gardening

Saturday: 3 hours heavy and moderate gardening

Sunday: 45 minutes moderate gardening

Tuesday, watching all the people flowing in to the YMCA in their work clothes, I was thinking that modern society had created a strange dichotomy. We work all day, 8 hours or more, and then we have to actively go somewhere to use our muscles. And then Thursday, as I was digging grass out of the front bed, panting and straining, I realized that I like it better when my life generates my exercise. At the end of the hour and a half of heavy labor, I had a strong heartbeat, pleasantly sore muscles, and a clean flower bed. There's a very different sense of accomplishment at the end of an actual project. So, I'm going to keep looking for those opportunities and keep giving myself credit for them in my exercise plan.

Back to Me

2009-07-11T07:58:00.004-05:00

With the Surprise Jacket done, I am able to return to my own sweater. I made alot of progress this winter, with the torso finished and the sleeves almost done, and then put it down in favor of Sabine's quilt and Maggie's sweater. It was nice, though, to pick the project back up and immediately make such visible progress. The sleeves are attached and I'm working my way up the bodice. It's an easy patter, but with just enough thought required to keep it interesting. I knit enough over the 4th of July weekend to bruise my left pointer finger, the one I use to help push the stitch off the needle because the yarn tends to stick.

Again, I didn't make the best yarn choice. Its very stiff and hard to knit with, and this sweater will be comfortable but definitely not soft. That said - I'm loving both the texture and the color. I think it will get alot of wear. I do want to make another, though, in softer yarn. Eventually.

Washing Away a Mood

2009-07-10T06:49:00.003-05:00

I woke up this morning to the drum of a gentle rain on the roof. Its soaking my freshly-weeded garden, cooling the air and making the birds sing with joy. I am watching the fall of the rain over the brim of my coffee cup, a little dog curled at my hip, and thinking this is a lovely way to start a Friday.

How did she do?

2009-07-06T19:50:00.003-05:00

I took the holiday week easy and mostly had fun, but I didn't lose my momentum altogether.

Monday: cardio, stretching and strength building

Weekend: swimming and stretching in the pool

Maggie's Surprise

2009-07-03T07:30:00.005-05:00

I don't usually knit for friend's babies. It just takes too long, and my skills still aren't up to snuff. But, when a working Mom who wanted to learn to knit a sweater for her baby never got a chance, I couldn't resist making one for her. It also gave me a chance to try out the legendary Baby Surprise Jacket by Elizabeth Zimmerman. The sweater is just as cool as they.

This is what you have when you finish knitting - a strangely shaped mass of garter stitch.

But then you fold in two places - and have a sweater. The woman was a genius. A mad genius.

All you need to do to finish is sew up the two seams and sew on five buttons.

I really enjoyed making this sweater and I love how squishy and comfortable it turned out. I used a new yarn, Bernat Cot'n Corn, and the finished sweater does feel really good. But, I won't knit with Cot'n Corn again. There were way to many knots in the skeins, the yarn had a tendency to split and it would even come out of the ball unraveled enough to require me to cut away large sections. Then end result just wasn't worth the hassle, and I'm concerned about how it will wear over time. Fortunately, the baby won't fit it for long anyway.

Perhaps I can blame the difficulties with the yarn for how slowly I knit. I don't think so, though. My jaw dropped when I read the Harlot's comment that she can whip out this sweater in 6 to 8 hours over the weekend. Seriously, that's what she said. I read that while looking for some help with a step I didn't understand, and I was well past the half way point. I knew I had already spent much more time than that on the sweater, so I started paying attention to how my bursts of time on it were adding up. I spent more than 6 hours on the last third. I. Am. Slow. No wonder it feels like it takes me forever to finish anything I knit - it does. The funniest part is my knitting method is the one recommended to increase speed. Its a good thing!

I Florida

2009-06-30T07:07:00.000-05:00

My job requires a good bit of travel during the day, but generally its not to the prettier areas of my home. Last week, though, it took me out of town and in to the Ocala National Forest and the surrounding rural area. I took a short break in a national park, enjoying the cool lake water on a 100 degree day. I checked out the 50s era sign reminding me that Black Bears will come eat my food if I leave it out and said hello to some less reclusive native life. And I found a grape orchard, which my father in law would love, using peanuts as groundcover, which my mother would love. A lovely reminder of why I love Florida, made extra special because it was a work day.

See you at Home Depot

2009-06-29T10:43:00.001-05:00

"It smells like popcorn in here all of a sudden."
"Or an electrical fire."

Followed by a check of the dishwasher and billowing black smoke. I can now confirm that an electrical fire (or maybe the near miss of one) does indeed smell like popcorn. I'm sure glad Alex knew about that.

How did she do?

2009-06-29T07:10:00.000-05:00

Home Run

Tuesday: cardio, stretching and strength training

Thursday: cardio, stretching and strength training

Sunday: cardio, stretching and strength training

We also took a half hour (leisurely) walk after dinner both Saturday and Sunday nights. The walks were wonderful, and we felt so mellow afterwards. We're hoping to make this a habit. The dogs are really hoping we'll make a habit of it.

How did she do?

2009-06-22T21:10:00.003-05:00

Tuesday: cardio, stretching and strength training

Thursday: cardio, stretching and strength training

Two trips per week seems to be all I can do on a regular basis, and even that is an effort. I thought the gym would be a habit by now, that it would be a routine and easier to get there. Its not. I still try to make excuses and answering to the blog is definitely part of the motivation to get there enough to at least not be embarrassed by the report. Sigh. So, I'll keep at it and hopefully some day it will be routine.

Adventures in Durian

2009-06-21T08:19:00.000-05:00

Alex recently took his parents to our local asian market for the fresh fish. They came home with this strange looking fruit, in addition to the stinky fish. (I'm just glad they didn't bring home any of the live snails or crawdaddies.) It was frozen, and they were told to let it thaw and then cut between the spikes.

My mother-in-law and I did a little research and found we had a Durian fruit. The article I found by a south Asian chef left me a bit dubious. She said that, while it was a delicacy in Thailand that often caused tussles at the produce stand, it is generally considered vile by those with a less familiar palate. She warned that the smell would be overwhelming, so she recommended eating it while still partially frozen. Apparently, that would also mute the taste a little. The taste itself? It would be a mix of sweet fruit, onion, garlic, and another suggested it would be perhaps a hint of gym sock.

Duly warned, we cut in. The spikes are on a woody hull, but it was relatively soft in its mostly-thawed state. We pulled it apart and found a pocket of cream-colored fruit the texture of custard. I scooped it out with my hand and dumped it in to a bowl. There was a huge seed in the middle of it, but it was easy enough to squeeze that out and be left with the fruit. The durian was roughly divided in to quarters and so we had four of these pods.

We served it up and the reactions were immediate. My 9 year old cousin declared it vomit; my husband disgusting. My father-in-law refused to try it until forced, and Alex's cousin took a microscopic bite. My mother-in-law, our friend and I were a little less sure we hated it. We definitely tasted the garlic and onion, and we didn't think we liked it. But, we found ourselves going back to try another bite. On the other hand, we threw away most of it. In the outside trash - the strength of the smell was not exaggerated.

It was an interesting adventure, but I won't be among the ranks tussling over the freshest Durian in the Thai markets any time soon.

Summer Is...

2009-06-20T17:40:00.000-05:00

:: Barbecue and watermelon
:: Swimming with the dogs

:: Soft air smelling of damp leaves
:: A matinee on a hot afternoon

How did she do?

2009-06-16T13:44:00.001-05:00

Wow - Monday night flew by and here it is already Tuesday afternoon. But, to recap last week.

Monday - light yoga
Wednesday - cardio, stretching and strength training
Friday - cardio, stretching and light strength training
Sunday - a long walk on the beach (yeah!)

I'm having alot of trouble with the muscles in my neck, so I'm pacing myself right now. I had a (painful) massage last Thursday that really helped, and I'll be going back tomorrow for another. But, I'm still getting the exercise in, so that's something. Tonight I'm planning to try the yoga again and see if that helps.

Finding my Touchstone

2009-06-15T08:47:00.002-05:00

When I left for college, I was a small town girl. All of my memories were rooted in the same community, where I knew someone around every corner and always had family nearby. The first few weeks away were rough. I was miserably homesick and the 2 1/2 hours between school and home felt so far. Then I was walking across campus on a beautiful September day and I felt this bubble of contented happiness well up deep inside. At that moment, I knew I had made the right choice and was where I needed to be.

I've felt that bubble again over the years. Shortly after moving to D.C. and meeting Alex, it came as I was walking down the sidewalk to shop at Eastern Market. A year or two in to law school, watching the lights come on in my neighborhood on a cold Fall evening. Walking the dog around my apartment complex back here in Florida. Its my touchstone, that feeling, my signal that I'm making the right choices in my life. That the world is simply right. Not an every day thing, but a little message from myself that I hear in moments of peace.

Last week I realized I haven't felt that bubble in quite a while. Instead, I've been feeling a nagging disquiet. Nothing is wrong, but I wasn't entirely sure it was right either. Too often irritable voices have snapped out at one another, leaving bruised feelings that never quite have a chance to completely heal. Too many work concerns have followed us home, intruding and casting a shadow. Life has felt too full, too uncertain - too much. My attempts at something different have provided only momentary relief, followed by frustration when the simple task of choosing dinner leaves us in our separate corners. I've started to think again about what I would do if I left my job, what the after might be if this job I have loved is becoming a weight I can't bear. To reconsider choices and wonder if its time to adjust our plans, but with no idea what the alternative might be.

And then we spent this weekend at the beach, just the two of us away from everyone. It wasn't the clean escape I had hoped; those irritable voices managed to find us there. But, it was a chance to find our rhythm again. Lying together watching an afternoon storm rage on the ocean, holding hands as we walked on a quiet beach at night, listening to live music in a smoky bar - none of it planned but simply unfolding. The next morning I took my coffee out on the beach and walked by myself there in the quiet, alone with nature. And in that moment of peace, my touchstone welled within me. All is well.

Its reassuring, this knowledge that my disquiet is superficial. That what resides deep within is happiness. I can't be done looking for the shift that will put things in place; I know that. Superficial disquiet can become something deeper if I don't respond to the message being sent. But, it helps to know I'm playing with the right pieces.

Wrap Up

2009-06-13T08:18:00.001-05:00

Here it is - the Wrap Skirt from Weekend Sewing, finally photographed and blogged. It is already getting a great deal of wear, and compliments. Last weekend I wore it to a family party and really enjoyed the shocked "you made that?" from the non-sewers. Mom, a talented seamstress, spotted it immediately as a handmade skirt. She complimented it and started a chain reaction of "you made that?" "Look, Cara made her skirt." It is comfortable, fun to wear, and I feel good in it. Perfect.

Summer Pace

2009-06-11T12:40:00.003-05:00

The air is heavy and dense with humidity, hanging on your skin and slowing your steps. My usually brisk work day pace giving way to the recognizable stroll of the south. This, I believe, is the reason for the southern drawl and our famous (or at least infamous) lazy pace. When the very air creates resistance to your movement, you might as well take a moment to smile at that stranger or stop to chat with the neighbor. You're not going anywhere fast anyway. And when you do, you learn you're getting where you're going anyway.

Of course, air conditioning is changing that. You keep moving to get to that blessedly cool air, to breathe a little more easily. I'm not going to shake my fist at technology. I am glad for the relief of air condition and remember the years I lived without it with a touch of awe. But, I want to remember the natural rhythm of life too, the value of a slower pace now and again.

Finito

2009-06-10T07:32:00.000-05:00

The birthday quilt from back in March is finally done. I went back and added additional quilting, and the flowers really pop in three dimension now. (Can you tell? It seems really hard to see the texture in the photo.) The one good thing about having to go in to work this weekend is that I was able to leave the quilt for the Mom as a surprise for Monday morning. She was as excited as I hoped she'd be, and it was fun to give a quilt to someone who really wants one.

We'll just overlook the fact that she has started calling it a blanket. After all, I'm told that the recipient is "a blankie girl" who carries them around, tucking her dolls and stuffed animals in and sleeping with at least one. A loved quilt by any other name...

How did she do?

2009-06-09T20:23:00.002-05:00

Work got in the way again this week. I did a full work out on Monday - 30 minutes of cardio, stretching and then strength training. The rest of the week I settled for stretching at home. This week isn't off to a great start either. But, right now, it is just going to have to be 'do what you can.' Tomorrow, though, I'm going to the gym.

How did she do?

2009-06-01T07:59:00.000-05:00

Not bad. Not bad.

Monday - Cardio and stretching

Tuesday - Wii yoga

Thursday - Cardio, stretching, and strength building

Saturday and Sunday - manual labor

I spent the weekend helping my sister and her husband move in to their new cottage in the midst of a horse farm. My first task was assisting with re-screening the front porch. Then it was moving furniture and boxes, cleaning and generally making myself useful. It was wonderful and I am pleasantly tired. But, it was definitely manual labor.

Wanderings

2009-05-26T15:17:00.003-05:00

I took an extra day off today, which turned out to be tons of fun. After just a little time on laundry and gardening, I went out and explored. I started out to finally go in to a food co-op I think I should check out every time I drive past. They are open a whopping 18 hours a week, as it turns out, and today wasn't part of that. But, the asian grocery store was open. And full of people buying interesting things. I wandered through with Alex and his co-worker after lunch and found my kissing candy.

And then I took myself off to the Orlando Science Center. It is always great to go to a museum when everyone else is at school and work. I got to play with all the fun Grossology stuff that would normally be surrounded by a human barricade six children deep.
I also discovered they have live animals there. I don't remember that from my childhood. They fed the crocodiles (why crocodiles and not alligators, which actually live here? I couldn't tell you) crickets while I was there. I ended up spending three hours there. Great fun - I highly recommend visiting a museum by yourself on a weekday. The self-paced exploration can't be beat.

Oh! I wore my new Wrap Skirt during my wanderings today. It was comfortable and garnered compliments, so its a resounding success. Unfortunately, I had no photographer and was too lazy to get out the tripod. I'll have to get you pictures next weekend.

How did she do?

2009-05-25T09:06:00.002-05:00

Uhm - yeah. The only exercise I can claim all week is Wii yoga on Sunday morning. I spent most of the week in a conference, and then a fourth day flying to and from Ft. Lauderdale to give a training. This week, no excuses.

Decisions, Decisions

2009-05-23T09:14:00.002-05:00

It's raining. Again. We desperately needed good rain after the drought, but we didn't need it all at one time. On the other hand, I know just what to do with a rainy Saturday morning. Brew a cup of tea and turn on the sewing machine.

This morning its back to the Wrap Skirt. I'm really enjoying sewing it, particularly in such a relaxed manner. I went slowly and was careful with my french seams, and for a change they came out perfectly. I also realized that sewing such a large skirt is alot like sewing a big quilt; there's alot of fabric to guide as you add the panels. I could probably have finished the skirt this morning (having browsed Flickr and decided to go with the yellow after all), but I ran out of fabric and I need to cut more panels. Or I at least think I do.

Heather has published errata regarding the number of panels you need, but I still read them to mean that I need six. But, warned by all the other comments about adding more panels, I've tried wrapping it around my waist and I think I need a seventh panel. The overlap is so small that, without another panel, I think I'll be flashing every time I move. So, if the rain ever lets up enough, I'm going to go buy more fabric. And then hope I can figure out how to adjust the waistband to fit.

Hmm - I guess I also need to decide whether to change from the yellow waistband and ties or not, since I'm going to the fabric store anyway...

Scrappy

2009-05-23T08:16:00.000-05:00

I'm still slogging through my Carnival Tumblers quilt. My pleasure in it is definitely waning as I try (and try and try) to settle on a layout, and then have to figure it out again as I screw up the order. I don't think I'm a truly scrappy quilt girl. The lack of color control seems to be frustrating me, and thats even though I made sure I had a unifying color scheme. But, my sewing room helper keeps holding the blocks out to me and encouraging me to finish. I'm almost there now, and I suspect that putting the border on (the Carnival Bloom that was the basis of this quilt) will pull it together for me. Either that or I'll finish it off and give it to my sister, who has commented that she really likes it every time she's seen it on the floor of my sewing room, regardless of what permutation of the lay out it happens to be in. Then I won't have to look at it anymore.

You know, if my sister the trained artist doesn't think it matters what order I put the blocks in, it probably doesn't. I need to ease up and just finish it.

How did she do?

2009-05-19T06:28:00.003-05:00

Eh - not so well.

Tuesday: cardio and stretches

Friday: Wii yoga

Sunday: cardio and strengthening

I was all off schedule this week. My mother had a packed schedule on Mother's Day, so I called her Monday instead. She called me back while I was on my way to the YMCA. I ended up sitting in the parking lot for 45 minutes before deciding just to drive on home (using my hands free earpiece!) and finish the conversation. We had alot to talk about. But, I had to work Tuesday night, so I had a shortened lunchtime work out.

Then, Thursday, I took my car for some work that I thought would be just the afternoon, but it turned out to be several days. My gym bag, including my membership card, was in the car. So, I went out to dinner with Alex and the boys before they went to watch the Magic rout the Celtics. I planned to use the Wii when I got home, but I went to bed with my book instead. Friday evening I finally turned on the Wii and did the yoga.

Sunday, finally, I went to the Y for a full workout. Of course, yesterday I went to see Star Trek instead of working out, and I won't be going today either since I'm in a conference until 9 tonight.

Weekend Sewing

2009-05-17T15:23:00.002-05:00

With another quiet weekend stretched out before me, I broke out, appropriately enough, Weekend Sewing. Last weekend, when my friend was visiting, I bought daring fabric for the Yard-Sale Wrap Skirt that I probably wouldn't have brought home on my own. Ironically, I am very happy with how it looks in this skirt. But, I haven't started sewing yet, because the contrast fabric bothers me. The simple yellow just doesn't feel right. I have real doubts about it, and I may need to make a trip out for more fabric. Definitely not a solid. Looking at it, I'm not sure I want a contrast fabric at all...